How can I become what I want, if the fucking school grades is stopping me?

Unbelievable.

less is more, right? nahhhhh

thinking of redoing my website into a 8bit one but i feel i cannot do that because i suck at everything about graphics

Full like a kastrull! [link] (I would love to be a non-Swedish person and hear this, this must be as funny it is in English as it is in Swedish )

Anyway, what's your top 3 favorite colors that blend well together.

Mine are:
Black
White
Dark Blue

If you want some awesome images of how it would look like, here's a link: [link]

I mean, that looks really nice, you don't have to like computers and their look but the colors look so good together!


PS. It's not my computer mod or anything, just something I saw the images on a forum that I usually visit.

Tell me what your top 3 colors are!

Been working my ass of to get my grades up to be able to take on an education as a game-programmer. It's my dream, has been for my whole life. Ever since I started playing video games.

I got called to an interview a few weeks ago and there were 30 persons of us to fill 22 available spots.


A few days ago I got an email on how I did. I didn't get in.

And as a result, I was in the replacement list #8. If calculated, that makes me the last person of those 30 persons who were called to the interview.



I have never hated myself more than these days from when I got the response, and I hate myself for not being smart.

Yesterday when I went to bed, the whole thing sank in and I cried myself to sleep, no kidding.

Right now I just want to be alone, and as an second home for me, WoW is there to fill that void.. somewhat at least.

I just plain suck. And I wished I was someone else..

A part of my personal website is up for the public at [link] (none of the links work yet, only the main page works.)

It's still under development but lately I've started playing WoW again, so not so much time over for playing around with the site. Still playing around with how I should structure the site so it's an enjoyable yet clean site.

The site will be in both English and Swedish (mostly in English for now, some things are Swedish but don't worry about that. But if you really want to know what the Swedish things means, google translator is your best friend.. well it's somewhat accurate. )



BUT! I would like to hear what you guys/girls think of the site so far.

All criticisms and comments are welcome - the only way to improve!

lately i've started feeling weird, not sure what it is..

feels like something's missing, not sure what or why.

everything just feels so meaningless right now..



i'm sorry to not reply to those who have written something here on my profile or faved anything of the things i have.. i feel no purpose to answer right now, sorry

i have 700+ messages (mostly journals) and about 11k deviantions in my devwatch inbox right now, as much as i love art and artists, i feel there's no time to look through all those and fav/comment on any of those

also the lack of drawing skills draws me away from this site (no pun intended), I will probably leave this site (but the account will be left though).

I has them nao.

(finally I can see people at long distances..)

Looking at my pageviews I only got 3.797 pageviews, but when I look at [link]

I have Views: 30,697 (67 today) Downloads 48,666 (168 today)?

Somethings wrong.

I said in my last journal that I would put info about the thing I'm working on right now, but I guess I have to wait for that for the next journal entry.

I just came to think about some old stuff I've done, websites! (for myself & friends, not for any company)

I hope it can give some inspiration for those looking for it.. anyway, enjoy.

(Oldest to newest)
lnla2 - [link]
Core Green - [link]
Simple-Style - [link]
Simple-Style v2 - [link]
Smooth-Style - [link]
Rusty-Steel - [link]
Project-180 - [link]
LameLosers - [link]
Leonardo da Vinci - [link]
Nightmare.Offline - [link]
GrayFreedom - [link]
HeadZ - [link]

I'm probably the only one who has lots of ideas (for my "project" I'm working on) but cannot draw them out on a piece of paper!

Not being able to draw tears me to pieces. GRR! I know drawing comes with practice, but still, you need a natural talent for it right?


Oh well, I'm going to it my way anyway but I won't be able to draw the characters I have in mind. I guess I have to save money for someone to do a commission or something. (Self-note, find more info about PayPal)

I'm getting somewhat close on how the characters are (personalities and clothing etc) but still havn't really brainstormed enough about the story.

Next journal I will post more about the characters, names, logo and stuff like that.

PS. Cross your fingers that my distance courses (not sure how it's spelled in English) will be able to picked before Jan 25th. Else my thoughts of getting a new computer for BFC2 are crushed (money related stuff). D: DS

Hi and merry x-mas!

I would just like to say some words that's happen during the year of 2009.

I started the year by grabbing hold of my future career by going to school again (I was a dropout) and study and improve my grades for the education I want to come in on. While the first half of the year I started going to gym too (I'm a skinny guy) and wanted to put some weight and muscles on me. And after a few months I met my current girlfriend, who I love very much! She is my second girlfriend, but she feels like she is my first. The first probably just used me as a rebound-guy (not sure what you call it). But anyway, my current girlfriend found me through the internet and we like the same stuff. Which I think is really great having to share stuff with each other!

Second half of the year I went to school again but during this time I somewhat got very tired and still are very tired. I'm not sure why but it's probably because of my computer usage. >.<

But the year 2010 is the year of promises! I promise I will get a hold of school and make it so I can get into my future education to become what I want to become.

Also there's some other promises I want to make (some are not only restricted to year 2010);
-Believe in myself, have better confidence about what I do and in my dreams.
-Be a better boyfriend & person.
-Try to be able to draw. (At least the characters in the story)
-Make a project to create a story about 2 main character. (Male name chosen, female isn't. Also I will update this in another journal.)
-Try creating a game via UDK and somewhat be able to cooperate the story with the game. (Unreal Development Kit, www.udk.com)
-Buy a new computer. (Hopefully and use the old one for server purposes)
-Buy a domain so I can make my own site. (Name still not chosen, have some ideas though)
-Build a homepage for myself.
-Learn C++/PHP/Other scripting languages. (already know some PHP, but cannot rely without references)
-Complete my "Forum-banner-so-people-can-see-what-I-like" signature in Flash. (Had some great ideas for it)
-Become better at keeping contact with my friends.
-Start at the gym again when I find the motivation.
-Learn Japanese.
-Have a birthday party for myself and invite my friends. (Usually only been me and my family and a few friends.)
-Hopefully be an inspiration to others.
-Hopefully piercing my right eyebrow and maybe get some tattoos I have in my mind on my body.

Also so you know some of my personality, I think the glass is half empty.

Dammit! I WANT do create SOMETHING!

I want to create a unique story that's never been heard before. Something I can somewhat draw or make a comic of, and maybe make a small game/mod from the story.

With that I want to create:
Characters
Items > Weapons, shields etc
World map > Forest, Swamp, Sea, Mountains etc



But everything I come up with is already created. I mean, who wants to play another Zombie mod for example..



If I just had the gift to be able to draw somewhat beautiful.

The day I got money, I will tattoo my nick (Sås) on my back and some Albert Einstein quotes all over my body.

I just love his quotes. He was an awesome man and he sure is my idol.

Maybe I should start considering what my tattoo would look like and what quotes I want on my body. D:

I played console (NES & SNES) on the TV when I was young, that got me hooked up on games. But mostly thanks to Zelda/Link games. I absolutely love the games! My favorite game is still (and always will be) Zelda: Link to the Past.

I feel sad I cannot find my old SNES console, but I have the game on my GBA.

Whenever I play the game, I remember when I played it on my SNES console.. Good times.

"If you put your mind to it you can accomplish anything."

Apparently I cannot.


People don't seem to understand that their words hurt.

I'm 21 years old and I havn't figured out what I am really good at. There's drawing artists out there who are really good - that's their gift.

What is mine?

Everyone has one but I do not.

Thinking of writing down what my interests are, but I don't have time right now.

Laters!

(I'm not sure how people do Polls on this site, but I can't find any options for it. Even though I see people have polls all the time.)

Question is, do you think people who aren't artists to be allowed on DA?

I can safely say I am not an artist, I lack the creativity and the overall art creation.

Do you think people like me should still be allowed to be on DA?

Yes/No

Some people can draw, some people can sing etc. Tell me what your talent is.

Myself, I don't really know. I know pretty much about computers, since I grew up with computers. However I'm more an 'allround' guy when it comes to computer and games.

I've never been REALLY good at some game or anything about computers.. so I'm not sure what my talent, or "gift" are. Which I hate by not knowing what I'm really good at. D:

I'm thinking of making MJ's "Beat it" dance in TF2 using model animations. I've had this idea for about a week or so. Since I love MJ and his music, I wanted to make a tribute, but didn't know about what or how.

Well atleast this is an idea. I have to check some tutorials on animating models in TF2.


RIP MJ.